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DLISTED (2005-2023)


Michael K / June 30, 2023
2395


Today is the last day of Dlisted. And if anything’s feeling it hard, it’s my
delete button since I’ve hit it (and not in a sexy way) at least 800 times while
trying to write the first few sentences of this final post. I couldn’t hate
goodbyes more if they wore CROCS, and I’m a master at the Irish exit, but this
is one goodbye I want to and must make. But be warned, if the love child of an
obit and a sad awards show acceptance speech sounds like a Rosemary’s Baby to
you, then brace yourself because that’s what this post may turn out to be.

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Tags: The End
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GOODBYE DLISTED


Allison / June 30, 2023
127


“Do you ever read Dlisted.com?”. I can still remember my friend Addie asking me
during a break in one of my college classes. Although since this story takes
place in 2005, I’m pretty sure she said the full website address, like
Dlisted-dot-blogspot-dot-com. It doesn’t matter, really. The relevant
information here is that long before I began writing for Dlisted; it was my
dream to write for Dlisted.

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Tags: Goodbyes
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HARD TO SAY GOODBYE


Ben / June 30, 2023
82


I promise I won’t make this too long.

Thousands of years ago (aka 2008), my friend Akona introduced me to the magic
that is Dlisted.com. As someone who loves pop culture and entertainment news, I
did a deep dive. And once I finally regained consciousness from the beatdown of
sarcasm and top-tier writing, I knew I was in love. 

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Tags: Goodbyes, I Love You, Thank You For Being A Friend
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WHAT DLISTED MEANS TO ME


Mieka / June 30, 2023
117


I’m not a particularly smart woman. I mean, my brain’s a’right, I guess. But
it’s not like when I die; anybody’s going to be chasing my corpse around with a
mason jar, trying to capture my lobes for science. My shit is 100%
USDA-certified Abby Normal. Which is probably why I’m here, honestly, and I
suspect, why you’re here too. Michael K rolled out of bed one morning and said
to the world, “I am going to create a blog that is so dumb…” and well, the rest,
as they say, is Dlistory as of today. Oh shit, I think I’m gonna puke.

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Tags: Beyond Sadness, Butt Stuff, Goodbyes
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IT’S THE SERIES FINALE


Kristian / June 30, 2023
47


I cannot believe that after all these years, my time with Dlisted has come to an
end. I don’t know how I’ll cope without talking so much shit every morning. I
will have to find a similar release, so please follow me on all my socials to
see how that goes!–I’m @Kristianidy on many of them. It’s been wonderful making
jokes about people hotter and richer than I am, and I will continue to do so
even when not being paid. A big, gigantic thank you to King Daddy Michael K!–if
Dlistedweres a Housewives franchise, he would be Andy Cohen (minus all the
bullshit). We all would not be here if we weren’t enamored by Michael’s hilarity
during the rise of online celebrity gossip! He’s a trendsetter, and we’re all
just following along.

And, of course, I want to thank EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOU for reading, commenting,
emailing, and being a part of this wild, wacky, and wonderful journey. It’s been
so absolutely magical and amazing.

I’ll see you all at the next gig! Be blessed and beautiful! <3

Pic: Jennifer Graylock/INSTARimages

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Tags: Goodbyes
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GOODBYE MY LOVERS, GOODBYE MY FRIENDS


Emily / June 30, 2023
82


I’m an anxious person. I hem, I haw, I catastrophize, and I loooathe change. I’d
rather have my eyes Clockwork Oranged and be made to watch an entire sports
match than face the great unknown. So, like many of you, the news that DListed
was shutting down totally bummed me out. Truly the end of an era. But, on the
plus side, how lucky were we to get to be a part of it? Hell, I still have a
hard time wrapping my head around the fact that I actually got to write for
Michael K.

The moment I saw Michael’s “Writers Wanted” post back in January 2020, I was
petrified. I really, really wanted it. And wanting something that badly is
scary. My brain said, “You?! Ha. Ya got zero chance, so don’t even bother. Now,
let’s smoke weed and watch six hours of Glee. I said NOW, bitch!” For days, I
procrastinated writing my sample article about Cameron Diaz naming her newborn
daughter “Raddix.” But, eventually, I bit the bullet, did the work, and applied.
I got Michael’s “you’re hired” email in the middle of teaching a Level B improv
class. I told the students to take a quick break from zip-zap-zipping, ran to
the bathroom, and happy-screamed into my sweater. A moment of pure joy. And it
would’ve never happened had I not taken a goddamn leap. So, maybe embracing
change, facing your fears, “Yes, And-ing,” and all that other corny improv shit
is… good? UGH. Maybe. But I’ll still miss DListed.

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